"We try to live responsible, logical lives. But we can't tell our hearts what to feel. Sometimes our hearts lead us to places we never thought we wanted to go. And sometimes our hearts can be the sweetest, gentlest things we have. Sometimes our hearts can make us feel miserable, angry, excited and confused... all at once. But at least my heart is open. I'm writing again. I'm feeling. I'm breathing." -Liz Parker (played by Shiri Appleby)

Current Music: 加藤ミリヤ×清水翔太 - Love Forever | Powered by Last.fm

Finally, something I have read is becoming a television series! Back in high school days, an online friend introduced me to The Vampire Diaries by L.J. Smith. I borrowed it from the library and read them all, then later ended up purchasing the entire set from amazon. Readers kept craving for more and the author decided to write a spin-off trilogy. As of now the first book from the spin-off has been published. The later two books will be coming out in 2010 and 2011. The main cast has this uncanny resemblance to Roswell's main cast, mainly because they're all brunettes. =S Whether the series does the books justice or not, the storyline will still be far better than the crapfest Twilight has to offer. I love how The Vampire Diaries came out a decade before Twilight even existed.

"In our lives, there are times when we can't fulfill our promises. There are times when love doesn't blossom. There are times when dreams don't come true. We live our lives groping, trying to solve a quiz that has no answer..." -Shiki Tomokawa from "Itoshi Kimi e"

School went along fine despite the occasional stress that was faced. Then came along graduation, where I walked across the stage for my department's recognition ceremony, wearing the not so aesthetically eye pleasing purple cap and gown. Receiving honors was an achievement. I want my real diploma certificate now damnit! Then came uncertainty thereafter. Who knew the graduation group picture would be our last one? A friend was lost from a misunderstanding/assumption. Through effort and massive contact she refused to communicate with us. Why after college ended did this happen? It was last year she decided to change her school login password without telling us. Mind you, we all never changed our passwords for registering reasons. Did she then lost trust in us? If so, why? Or why continue to act like nothing was lost? We came to the conclusion that we were used for emotional and educational support for her. In order for her to pass classes, she remained our friends without a sense of trust. She hid her essay grades away from us almost each time it was passed back, but she always had this peaking eyes to see our work grades. Other times she would ask us what we got, and she won't say her grades unless we ask her back. Really, what the hell? If you asked us what we got, we expect you to at least tell us what you received without us asking. I am most fired up about the long nights where I stayed up to proofread her papers. Until now, I believe she does not understands how much time I sacrificed for her to make sure she passed her assignments/classes.

Now that college is over, she no longer needs us for any use so we, leftovers, are kicked aside. It reminds me of high school days and has been irking me for the past weeks. I should not think about the past but I can't help it. The saying "good people will be rewarded accordingly". Well, hate to say... being nice in modern time, people love to take advantage in any way they can so they can benefit off of the nice person. Experiences in high school already made me feel like shit, but it is nothing compared to this situation which has far more impact because of a six year friendship.

It has been around three weeks since the rift and it has not been easy for anyone of us. One night, I fell asleep crying knowing if someone who I knew for six years could leave just like that, then anyone could leave me at an instant. If you ask me how I am feeling now, its a combination of anger, hatred, deceived, emptiness, and loneliness. I do not know how long it will take to heal this wound, but I do hope the people whom I completely trust will continue to show their support.

Remember well and bear in mind
That faithful friend is hard to find
And when you find one that is true
Change not the old for the new

Couldn't believe I found this handout from 10th grade's English folder!

1) Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
2) When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
3) Follow the three R's: Respect for self, Respect for others, Responsibility for all your actions.
4) Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
5) Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly. (For all the criminals out there.)
6) Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship. =)
7) When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
8) Spend some time alone everyday.
9) Open your arms to change but don't let go of values.
10) Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
11) Live a good honorable life, then when you get older and think back, you'll be able to enjoy it a second time.
12) A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.
13) In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situations. Don't bring up the past.
14) Share your knowledge. It's a way to achieve immortality.
15) Be gentle with the earth.
16) Once a year, go someplace you've never been before.
17) Remember that the best relationship is one in which your life for each other exceeds your need for each other.
18) Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
19) Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon. (Taking note of the 'cooking' part.)

Current Music: 中島美嘉 - SAKURA～花霞～ (DAISHI DANCE)

I was "dusting" and looking through old school work. Yes, I've kept the all of my written assignments/projects since 7th grade because I just can't seem to get rid of things. I'll be clearing the non-important or useless stuff to save space. =) Found this amidst the 8th/9th grade pile: Superstitions, dated March 6th, 1998. Some are clearly old-fashioned and nonsense.

1) It is unlucky to walk under a ladder.
2) Salt is used to protect you against the evil.
3) Cider must be made during the waning of the moon otherwise the apples will shrivel up and the cider will sour.
4) You can walk under a ladder and still be lucky if you cross yourself or cross your fingers and make a wish first.
5) If you eat a raven's egg, it will turn your hair black and if you suffer a severe fright, it will turn your hair white overnight.
6) To protect yourself from lightning, wrap yourself in a feather bed, sleep with a thimble under your pillow.
7) If you see a red truck: red truck, good luck.
8) If the fire draws badly, the devil must be around.
9) Witches cannot cross running water.
10) It is unlucky to start a new job on a Friday.
11) Getting out of bed on the wrong side can ruin your day. The right side is the right side... because the left side is sinister. In Latin sinister means left. (Left side is the only side I can get off. o_o)
12) To bring ring: stick a spade in the ground or kill a spider.
13) A sign of rain is the croaking of frogs during the day.
14) Never start any enterprise on a Tuesday, Monday is unlucky. Wednesday is the day for weddings.
15) Don't sleep with your head pointing north or death will follow. (Right...)
16) If three people are photographed together, the one in the middle will die first. (Creepy...)
17) To keep witches from moving, throw salt under their chairs.
18) Catch a leaf and you will have twelve months of luck.
19) Anyone appearing in new clothes must be pinched for good luck.
20) Skipping rope to make crops grow.
21) When you move into a new house, you must carry a loaf of bread and a plate of salt into every room.
22) See a pin, pick it up / All the day you'll have good luck / See a pin, let it lay / Bad luck you'll have all day.
23) Throwing a coin to a beggar brings good luck.
24) A baby born with teeth may be a vampire. (Babies born with teeth, is that even possible?)
25) A baby with large ears will be generous; one with small ears will be stingy.
26) A baby with a small mouth will be mean.
27) It is unlucky to spill salt. If this happens, throw a pinch over your left shoulder.
28) Salt is the first thing you put on a table and the last thing taken off.
29) For a bride to stumble while walking down the isle is very bad luck, probably leading to old-maidhood.
30) Apple orchards had to be serenaded, and cider-soaked toast left in the branches of the trees for the god of the orchard for a good harvest.
31) If a dead animal is not buried under the roots of a new tree, it will not bear fruit.
32) A raven croaks of evil. (Crows are more terrifying.)
33) The sparrow kept in a cage in the house will bring bad luck.
34) Ghostly dogs protect long-dead people.
35) Demon dogs accompany witches, headless dogs run rampant and cause luck to sour.
36) To stop a cold, catch an oak leaf before it touches the ground or rub yourself with bear grease. (BEAR GREASE???)
37) The reason horses blows on water before drinking at night is that water sometimes sleeps, and if an animal were to drink, it would die.

Completed a 5-page grant proposal section with a time line. Working on another analysis essay with five pages in completion, that leaves two more pages until I'm done. My brain is seriously losing its functionality... Its either my professor who did not spend as much time reading my assessment paper or maybe I met all the criteria in answering the lengthy questions. I think its the former though. Received a grade I am content with, so I am not complaining.

On the other hand, I wish this sore throat will go away. It has lasted a week due to my not-so-smart choices of picking food to eat. -__-

eBay is both a blessing and a curse. Many sellers are auctioning second-hand/brand new CDs, and with me being a collector, that is where the "curse" part comes from. Then there are J-pop releases that come with incentives like first-press pictured label on disc, limited edition digi-packaging, limited printing with x amount manufactured, bonus tracks, extra photo book, slipcase cover, more than one design of booklet cover, DVD extras, and/or a free poster. Becoming a J-pop fan literally makes your pockets empty. OMG, a new 玉木宏 album coming out!!

Looking forward to spring break. MUST DO SOMETHING PRODUCTIVE! =)

Replying to last post: I cut all those by hands & scissors. It was a test of patience.

Hi お兄さん aka my LGJ~ Didn't meant to hide from you. =(

Current Music: 玉木宏 - 踊ろうよ

768 sheets of 3"x3" origami paper in this bundle stack that I cut evenly as possible from 6"x6" papers. The 18 patterns are refreshing for my eyes to view and bought from eBay. ^_^ Now how long will it take me to fold all these???

Current Music: 원더걸스 – 미안한 마음